( This is my nephew and his friend studying in the tuition. I am interested in their cognitive development and ability in learning, I am a student of counseling and I would like to help people as much as I can. For me I don’t only deliver the knowledge of what they need but also well being of gaining knowledge.)
The majority of the students’ parents complains are that their child is not interested in learning. As they believe their child is good in studies as they grow up and goes to higher level their grades get lower. In Maldives a lot of students take tuition for many reasons. When the year starts parents concern is to find a better tuition than the one which the child goes to but not to find the root cause of the matter why actually the grades are low. As a tutor for so long here are few facts that I have noticed and which is happening in our culture and focused on Male’ ( the capital of Maldives).
Lack of space
Students concerned that they have less space to study. Not proper place, sometimes they have to sit on the bed and study because their sibling is using the table. Which I do agree, there are homes that I have visited and found these issues and I have encourage them fix the places in orderly so that they can have more space. Also prepare time tables so that each one can use the table. In that way problems can be minimized.
Most of the people live with extended families and there are always more trouble than peaceful, calm environment. Since concentration need less noisy environment, where if the students hear loud noises from his/her background, obviously it is difficult to concentrate. Like the sound of television or some useless political talk and elders having some sort of exciting conversation. If the study times are strictly respected by the elders, this will not happen. They should understand living in that kind of environment we need to have certain set of ways to deal with issues. Rather than expressing the jealousy of elders, not meeting their needs. However, if such noisy environments cannot be fixed one have to find an alternative solution, like you can take the child to the mosque or ask a friend for help or the best is to sit in a mosque.
The average of the problem is that the parenting issues. Now a days some parents are too busy with their work and taking caring of children. They hardly ever have time to sit and have a good conversation with their children. Parenting doesn’t mean washing their clothes and feeding them the mental well-being of the child is also as well important. The stressful parent later become abusive towards children and do things that they would totally get trapped in that fear. They should realize that they are not super powered human beings that they would know exactly what is going on in the child minds. The love, care and the attention that are given properly those parents’ children are better in studies than the stressful, or uncaring parents. Therefore good parenting does make a huge difference.
Here in the competitive environment the expectation of the parents are high. Sometimes the child may not want to study a particular subjects for many reasons. Rather pushing the child burdening them on extra pressure will allow them to increase the boredom to study. Then the behavior of the children changes and the good and interesting student ones like to learn become too distance. The best way to solve these issues are to talk to an expertise on this field for assistance or simply talk to your children without judging their thoughts. Quite often what happen is parents are don’t listen to their children and so many buts make them to given finally a deaf ear to the parents. You could ask help from an experience parent.
Influence from other environment
A growing up child will learn so many things from the environment that they be. School is the place most students pick up different behaviors and imitate or enjoy the cool side of it. On the other hand these changes from a child is not expected from the tradition of the family. Labelling and judging makes things worse. The child finally, feels more comfortable with the growing gang style and become nuisance to the teacher. Parents could stop this before it goes out of their hand. Sometime stepping out of the tradition value may help to understand the child behavior or always teaching the child that they are people who need help of elders to grow may overcome few things. Its good to have professional help and teach self-development to children.
Teach that failure is not a bad thing. That actually will help to overcome the weakness of the studies. That also help to enhance the areas that need to improve in the child ability. Some failures of some students are taken seriously and say things they later regret. Parents or teachers are the best people to know the weakness of the children and can help them. Including, the worst case of comparing to a students who score better than the child who fail may not help at all. It all also depending on the vulnerability of the children. Some take challengers and others tend to leave everything off. So , teaching failure is not bad somehow help the students motivation.
A very mystifying reason that I have come across is the boredom to study. The student just become so idle that he or she has no idea the root-cause neither the parents couldn’t find out. In this case it is always good to diagnose the child, I am not saying a counselor or a psychiatric to follow. But the parents to be aware of these changes of the students. This might be due to moodiness or hormonal change in the child body. This mainly happens with the students of teens and they for no reason go into depression and mood swings. Activities can help the child overcome these barriers.
How to overcome?
Frankly speaking, the solution to these issues are very simple. As I said before these are few very essential issues that I have come to know. The best therapeutic way to deal with these complications is to first educate and make yourself aware as a parent. Don’t assume anything and judge negatively about your child. The common reason, that child express is parents’ negative attitude towards them. Although they do mistakes try to resolve the problem with calmness. Each child is different and they have different abilities, try to learn these things by understanding how valuable is to your child. Shouting or raising voices is not the best way sometimes to deal with things. Sometimes, parents are wrong and it is not letting yourself down in front of your children. In fact is a beautiful manner that you are teaching to your child. My prayer is that may Allah give strength to your parenting hood and may he guide you to show the light of to achieve a better life to your children.
If you have any question regarding your child education issues I would like to offer my help, I will be in contact via mail firstname.lastname@example.org and thank you for the time you took to read.